my-thoughts-and-junk:

my-thoughts-and-junk:

Dude the full version is even better

[ID] An article in a magazine titled, ‘How to tell if your guardian angel is gay!’ Next to the title is a picture of two stereotypical angels. Above the title is text reading, “Which way does your spirit guide sway?” Next to the title is text reading, “EVER BEEN “goosed” out of the way of a speeding car? Then your guardian angel is probably a little light in the loafers!” Below the title is text that reads, “GENEVA—Your guardian angel might be gay! By STEVEN SUTCLIFF, Weekly World News. That’s the astounding word from paranormal psychologist Dr. Doug Wober, whose riveting new book, Which Way Does Your Angel Sway?, is taking Europe by storm. 

“Guardian angels are just like humans, they come in all shapes and sizes, all colors and both genders—and yes, some guardian angels are even gay,” the expert declared in the preface to his book.

“Not only that, there are clear signs that will help you determine whether your angel is wearing ‘pink wings’,” he continues.

“Some of the signs might sound silly. But that’s part of the cachet of having a gay guardian angel—historically, these angels are full of fun, and they love to play humorous games with the men, women and children they are charged with protecting.

“In that regard, the estimated one in 10 people who have gay guardian angels are lucky. They tend to be happier than other people and there’s certainly more fun and serendipity in their lives.”

Here, from Dr. Wober’s book, are key signs that indicate your guardian angel is gay:

1. You develop a heightened sense of “gaydar”—the ability to perceive a person’s sexual orientation—that tells you when you are in the presense of gay men and women.
2. You wake up in the middle of the night and find your TV is tuned in to reruns of The Golden Girls.
3. You find yourself singing show tunes from Broadway musicals that you have never seen.
4. There is a deadly explosion at your workplace and you miss it, because you are home watching Judy Garland movies.
5. You are saved from a mugging by a man in ballet tights, who pirouettes away before you can thank him.
6. You are saved from being run over by a car when a mysterious unseen finger gooses your rear.
7. You have an uncontrollable urge to buy tickets to a Ricky Martin concert.
8. You find a large number of Barbra Streisaand CD’s in your collection, and you can’t figure out how they got there.
9. You are out sleepwalking one night, and you wake up to find yourself in a conga line in a gay bar.
10. You keep seeing ghostly apparitions of members of the Village People.

Dr. Wober concludes: “If any of these things have ever happened to you, chances are, the guardian angel watching over you is a little light in his heavenly loafers.””

[end ID]